Five Rules for Asking a Girl Out

It can be quite nerve racking to decide on the best way to ask a girl out.  You need to consider a number of things, but these are the five rules you should always remember.

Do Not Call Her Immediately

Once you have your hands on the girl’s phone number, don’t call her straight away.  If you appear too eager, she may think you are pressurizing her, and she may be put off you altogether.

Give her time to get used to the idea that you will be phoning her, but don’t leave it too long or someone else may beat you to it.  Usually, waiting for twenty-four to forty-eight hours is best.

Do Not Ask Her for a Date Straight Away

When you do get around to phoning, don’t just jump into asking her out on a date.  Spend some time chatting about life in general, or a topic that interests you both.  If your instincts are telling you that you need to get to know each other a bit better before dating, arrange to meet for coffee or a lunch just as friends.

Alternatively, if you are arranging any type of group get together, you tell her she is welcome to come along. That way, you are not actually inviting her on a date, but it gives you the opportunity to get to know her better if she does come. 

Make Your Date More Fun than Stress    

Some people can make such a big deal out of their first date, they forget to have fun.  Your girl will be much more impressed if you are relaxed and can show her that you are enjoying her company and whatever it is you are doing.

If you are stressing out about making sure the date is a success, you are likely to be trying too hard and that doesn’t create a good impression and can be just as bad as being over-confident and blasé about the situation.

When choosing a venue or activity for your first date stick to something within your comfort zone.  You will have enough nervous energy to contend with, without having the stress that comes from dealing with a new environment or activity at the same time.

Just Tell Her Your Plans Instead Of Asking Her

It is very easy to get it wrong when you are choosing what to do and where to go on a first date.  Someone has to take the initiative, and that should be you.  Have some ideas in mind of what you would like to do, but tell your date what you're thinking about.  Providing she does not object or make alternative suggestions, you should go ahead and make the arrangements.

If your suggestions do not meet with your girl’s approval, ask her what she would like to do instead.  You may both need to compromise to find something you both want to do.

Depending on how well you have gotten to know each other, it will improve your chances of arranging dates that will meet with her approval.  You will soon learn whether she is happy to let you go ahead with arrangements for your dates without first consulting her. 

Many girls these days expect an equal say in the decisions, and if they don’t get it, they may perceive you as being domineering and controlling.   On the other hand, there are still a few girls around who are happy to leave all the decisions to you.

Convince Your Girl

Your first date gives you the opportunity to gather information about your girl and decide if you are likely to be compatible if you continue dating.  Just as she is examining you and forming an opinion, you need to do the same with her personality.  If you find that your opinions are conflicting about the small unimportant things, then you may have serious differences when it comes to the important life decisions.  Compromising may not be an option unless both parties are willing.